Pink Elephants vs Faire 2016 - Report
After only 19 pre-season nets, it was with some trepidation that Faire began the 2016 season. The venue - Vincent Square. The opponents - The Pink Elephants. The weather - bollock-shrivellingly cold.
But any frosty jockstraps were quickly thawed by a glance at the Faire team sheet. Stephen, Daly, Bowen - it represented a who’s who of cricketers who once scored a fifty at prep school.
Faire were inserted, Daly and C Stobbs strode out to the wicket, and Daly (4) swiftly strode back. But this only hastened the arrival of dangerman Rob Stephen. Used to playing in schools, Stephen quickly settled in to the 18th century vibe. He cut and drove with the professionalism of a seasoned coke dealer, and quickly kicked Faire’s season into gear. A single sequence saw the Dorking dasher hit five fours in a row, one of them even through the offside.
Partners in crime C Stobbs (44) and Potter (42) played foil, and when Stephen finally retired on 126*, Scarlett (12) came on to crack one through the covers for the second time in 24 hours. Stobbs min declared on 234/4 off 33 overs.
But upon taking the field to bowl, Faire realised why their scorecard had looked so handsome. The closest sign of movement came from a nearby crane, and despite a probing line from A Riches (the only bowler to regularly find the edge) the ‘Phants calmly progressed to 42 without loss. As is customary, the introduction of spin twins Hunt (1/33) and Kanagasooriam (1/34) brought much-needed breakthroughs, but the Elephants stomped onwards.
The arctic conditions did not help matters, although Kanagasooriam claimed it to be merely a coincidence that, having been pulled from the attack, he developed a life-threatening finger problem, and retreated to the pavilion to nurse a Flat White. Without their talisman, Faire lacked penetration, and The Elephants batted out the last 25 overs for a draw. Game over.
It had been a frigid affair, but credit must go to James (67) and Holben (60) for blocking out the occasional good ball, and the frequent bad sledging.
Next up - The Drakes on May 8th.
---- P. J. Stobbs